TV Shows:
“Homeland”

“The Walking Dead”
“Happy Endings”

“Person of Interest”
“Portlandia”

Video:
Duran Duran's "Girl Panic"

To Be Continued…

I gave up drinking for six months and my belly thanked me for it. While I haven’t sworn off beer entirely, my drink of choice involves more red varietals or a delicious spiced rum. 

Here’s to a new year, dear reader. You’re probably wondering, “What’s with the penis envy?” 

Allow me share to share a pair of stories, one at the end of the year and one that happened on New Year’s Day.

Picture the scene: Christmas mass. Holy day, right? I’m getting into the service. I’m listening and responding to the prayers, but to my left and one row up, I’m distracted by a young boy with his hand in his pocket. If I had to guess, he wasn’t much older than 13. At first, it looked like he was shifting some pocket change. When it looked like he was pulling downward repeatedly, maybe he wasn’t looking for quarters. Every time the congregation stood, his hand went straight back into his pocket, tugging more furiously at something else that stood at attention.

The not-so-subtle game of pocket hockey got so intense, the boy’s father had to intervene by mouthing, “Stop doing that.” Thank goodness I didn’t have to shake his hand during the sign of peace.

To be that young with a lack of self-control.

New Year’s evening found me walking the dog. My route has been the same the last five years, only the neighbor’s have changed. One house in particular has a new family living there after the last tenants left town suddenly. A chubby blonde boy played basketball in his driveway. Several weeks back, he had streaks of pink in it. On my walks, I block out the world with my iPod. Not this evening.

As I strolled past the boy in his driveway, he dribbled his basketball and sang aloud “My dick is so long. My dick is sooo long. I bet it’s bigger than yours…”

Where was my iPod when I needed it? I continued my walk and as I turned back to go home, I passed the boy again who said, “Oooo, if your dog shits in his yard, they’re gonna sue you! If your dog shits I bet it’s gonna stink real bad!”

I couldn’t believe my ears. “Excuse me, do you think I can’t hear you?” I asked from across the street.

“What did you say?” chubby boy with the apparent long dick asked.

“Did you want me to come over there and repeat myself?” I replied.

“No.”

“I didn’t think so.”

Happy friggin’ new year.

Kids today, I tell ya.

I did some yard work today. Looking down towards the end of my block, I saw chubby blonde boy dribbling his basketball again. In mid stride, he’d fallen in the middle of the street and an on-coming car had to make an abrupt stop.

I guess he tripped over his dick.

* * *

Highlights of 2011:
–Seeing Duran Duran during the “Ellen” taping at Universal Orlando.
–Getting my new Ford Fiesta.
–Quitting my marketing associate’s job with a food distributor.
–Starting my gig as a wine & spirits sales consultant.

Best Personal Moment:
–Losing nearly 15lbs.

Favorite Albums of 2011:
1. PJ Harvey “Let England Shake”
2. Bon Iver “Bon Iver”
3. Foo Fighters “Wasting Light”
4. Beastie Boys “Hot Sauce Committee, Pt. 2″
5. Ryan Adams “Ashes & Fire”

Looking forward to in 2012:
–A productive and prosperous year.
–An incredible Adam Ant concert! You going?
–A Smiths reunion, if Moz can’t score a record deal, he needs to phone the boys up for a new album & tour. Noel Gallagher agrees.

PetSmart: watched a kid reach his arm into a fish tank, I’m guessing to steal a fish. When he noticed me, he hopped off the counter, looking extremely guilty. A few moments earlier, a clerk asked me if I needed help. She needed to keep an eye on the little fish thief.

Wal-Mart: a father clad in faded wifebeater and acid washed jeans says, “Fuck this, I’ma take one of ‘em out of the package and put it in my g’damn pocket!” I think he was referring to Nerf darts. His baby momma pushing both his kids in the back of the trolley dutifully following behind. Class.

Maybe it’s time I motored West.

This month’s 30pov is a “best of” compilation. What better time for me to dust off this site in attempt to get your attention?

I’ve been reading comics since as early as I can remember. My parents introduced me to Disney comics when I was four. This led to the adventures of Lone Ranger & Tonto and ultimately, Spider-Man. I’ve always been a Marvelite for nearly three decades, but more recently, my tastes have been more open with the Distinguished Competition (DC comics, non-believers) and some indie stuff.

My graphic novel tastes are even leaning toward the hipster side. Good grief. Aging hipster indeed.

Listology, vol 3825: Brian’s monthly pull-list at ye olde comick shoppe

Marvel:
Amazing Spider Man
Avengers
Avengers Academy
FF
Marvelous Land of Oz
Moon Knight
New Avengers
Secret Avengers

Icon:
Casanova
Incognito
Kick Ass
Scarlet
Superior

DC:
Batman & Robin
Batman Beyond
Batman Odyssey
Batman: The Dark Knight
Flash
Green Lantern
Green Lantern Corps
Green Lantern Emerald Warriors
Wonder Woman
Zatanna

Vertigo:
iZombie
Sweet Tooth
Unwritten

Abstract:
Echo
Rachel Rising

Dynamite Entertainment:
Boys
The Last Phantom
Jennifer Blood

IDW:
Next Men
Suicide Girls

Image:
27
Chew
Hack/Slash (my current fave)
Lil Depressed Boy
Morning Glories
NonPlayer

Indie:
Rasl
The Guild (Dark Horse)

Well, that’s all I’ve got for now. Back to reading my stack o’ books. By the way, this Saturday is

Smooches.

For the Emotionally Constipated http://bit.ly/hYrW4p

Read, absorb and leave a comment on the page.

BTW, it’s probably a bit more personal than I anticipated…

Speaking of WTF (the Podcast that is), follow ‘em on Twitter. Maybe 2011 will bring us another exciting, irreverent episode. Heaven knows I’ve got some smartassedness to get out of my system. It’ll also get me off my butt–gotta lose some of this “training” weight before I stand in front of the camera. Attention whore that I am would also give you the link to my Twitter account, but if you look to the right, my updates show up for your reading pleasure. How convenient! Like Alexa Ray Joel sings, “Notice Me” (please)!

Have you watched “The Social Network” yet? Do yourself a favor and watch it. Next on my watchlist, the new Ashton Kutcher/Natalie Portman flick:

I sure hope it doesn’t disappoint. Natalie Portman = Yum. “Black Swan,” is another great movie you need to get off your arse and plunk down money to watch.

Just finished Kristen Hersh’s “Rat Girl.” Definitely a quirky, fun read. You can find some great music on her website. It’s free to download, contributions definitely appreciated. Ms. Hersh sent me a message on Twitter that made me beam with kewlness a few weeks back. Thought I’d share that with you.

Currently reading: James Franco’s “Palo Alto.”
Currently listening: CNN on the TV.
Currently craving: a sack of White Castle burgers.

What you should be adding to your iPod right now:
Duran Duran “All You Need Is Now”
White Lies “Ritual”
Gang of Four “Content”
Social Distortion “Hard Times and Nursery Rhymes”
I Blame Coco “The Constant”

Who wants to sponsor me to get out to Coachella to see Duran Duran? It never hurts to ask right?

That’s all I got for now. Smooches.

“Has Nic finally accepted Evan for who he is? Or has she just decided to play along?”

Here it is! For your reading pleasure, I give you “The Rules.”

Can you tell this will be the only thing I want for my birthday? Oh yeah, and tickets to their 2011 tour. I am an unabashed Duranie. Always have, always will.

Smooches.

I’ve been geeking over this:

Yes, I got the purple variant. And yes, I downloaded the Star Map app. Lovin’ it!

December’s POV topic is “Paradox.” I just submitted my draft for review tonight. Even with a little holiday extension, I was two days tardy. What can I say, I wasn’t feeling my first take. The second one, much better! It goes live on the 13th. Watch this space…

I tweeted earlier I was a fan of Bruno Mars. Time for another confession. I listened to one CD in my car today (left the iPod at home) on repeat:

One track in particular: Bruno Mars’ “Marry You.” I’m really liking Dianna Agron’s vocals. She isn’t as flashy a singer as Lea Michelle and I totally dig that. Don’t judge.

This is my second full week out of training with my new gig and I’m enjoying it immensely. I miss my classmates though… If you’re reading this guys & gals, CALL ME, we’ll do happy hour at 5:59:59pm.

Smooches!